As you probably know, I have a bit of a soft spot for The Asylum’s productions. Almost all of the time I find them so bad, they’re good. So with one of their latest offerings …

You’ll never guess what I’ve been to see. Speed Racer. Believe it or not, someone donated the required amount (much less than the requested £83.40 originally asked for) and I reluctantly walked into the cinema …

I don’t understand this. Surely the purpose of making a film is to get the public to go and see it. Surely if the Wachowskis and Silverboy wanted to earn some cash, it would …