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Romancing the Stone: a £3 DVD Review

Submitted by on June 29, 2008 – 2:22 pmNo Comment
What a great deal of films ignore in this day and age is chemistry. It is true that there are some exceptions. (albeit predictable) starred two people (Jolie and Pitt) who simply had the right sparks flying. It is important then, to consider some that show chemistry at its very best. stars , (what a voice) and . Turner (young, but looking like my grandmother in a lumberjack shirt initially) and Douglas wearing what seems to be a gardening hat. Douglas plays the reluctant Indiana Jones character with no manners whatsoever unwillingly defending a romance novelist against drug dealers (stereotypically written but ultimately very amusing) and a bad guy named Zolo sporting a very fetching 70’s porn-star style moustache. Turner spends most of the film squealing and transforming from my grandmother to a highly (one that deserves such a voice) through a series of torn clothing. Danny DeVito, despite not interacting with the main characters until much later is excellent by himself, keeping his head down where he is most wanted and being punched by a large Colombian woman.

This movie plays for fun and laughs above adventure and manages to sell the country of Colombia as a quite beautiful place to visit, despite being penned as nothing but a drug-running country. Who am I to judge? The fact is I want to go there and meet an eccentric drug dealer named Juan who instead of shooting me on the spot, takes me for a drive in his bullet proof and fire-proof “Little Mule”.

The not so bad guys played by Danny DeVito and Zack Norman are more entertaining than menacing, with Norman continue to point out the beauty of his alligators / crocodiles (I don’t know the difference: do you?) The statement “Look at those snappers” is repeated endlessly and yet entertains on every delivery. I’m surprised he was overlooked in the quite awful sequel (Jewel of the Nile). However I expect nothing short of an intervention by the great one himself could have stopped that train wreck!

Despite being a treasure hunt movie, very little treasure hunting made. In fact, it must have been one of the easiest in history as the characters become perplexed by a problem for no more than 10 seconds before solving the riddle. I wish I was that smart. Despite this though the film is great fun and worth it alone for the sight of Michael Douglas trying to dance.

In reviewing this movie, it has become clear that I am so very biased. This film is nostalgia for me with Douglas being the coolest (can you imagine that) and Turner being the sexiest. When you add a couple of bad guys, a moron chasing you down in the Colombian countryside and a large emerald, you have a great mix. For people of a certain age, this movie holds a special place in our hearts and anyone who disagrees is so very wrong!

Despite the embarrassment that was the Jewel of the Nile, Turner, DeVito and Douglas redeemed themselves perfectly with their turn in the War of the Roses. For all you younger people out there who don’t know what the Jewel of the Nile is, there was only one good thing that came from it. (I have included a youtube video for your perusal – keep an eye out for the backing singers...hilarious!)

Watch this film if you haven’t seen it, buy it if you don’t own it (I bought mine for £3). A great DVD for your collection of nostalgic, predictable but highly entertaining movies.

Rating: 4.5 out of 5

Yes: I think it’s that good!

If you fancy arguing with me about why this film is not as good as I claim, you are welcome to try. I will expect very good reasons for you not to like it though!

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