Photos

Random thoughts

Videos

Reviews

The Substream's Film Lab

Home » Reviews

Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus – as bad as it sounds!

Submitted by on May 12, 2009 – 6:29 pm2 Comments
megashark_largeI know what you’re thinking! How on earth did I end up reviewing a film with a gloriously awful title? must be up there with the world’s worst titles for film. When you realise that this badly titled film has been produced by The Asylum group, a light switch flicks on in your head and you somehow accept the silliness within. So if this is a silly film in which actors seriously play their roles, it may have just been brilliant (in a so-bad-it’s-hilariously-funny sort of way). Unfortunately though the film cannot shy away from the fact that this was a lazy attempt at film-making. Synopsis: The California coast is terrorized by two enormous prehistoric sea creatures as they battle each other for supremacy of the sea. Critique: Almost absolutely everything is wrong with this film. Does that sound harsh? It should. There is nothing wrong with trying to make an entertaining flick on a low budget. There is also nothing wrong with trying to make it amusingly bad. Unfortunately there is something very wrong when the title refers to a bunch of greatly re-used scenes and a two-and-a-half minute “climax”. If you’re not going to include much of the titled creatures (and even those scenes were shark-biased) then call the film something else! Think back to the classic film Jaws and consider why remaking that would be so expensive. It wouldn’t! Take one rubber shark and a large fake fin and pretend to terrorise a beach for 90 minutes! To some degree that would be entertaining! Sadly this film bothers not with such localised filming and insists on involving the world! For each of these prehistoric creatures to circumnavigate the world (according to the script) would take a maximum of six minutes (or thereabouts). Don’t get me wrong, I don’t expect realism. However is it too much to ask for a little bit of sanity amongst this quite preposterous tale? The “making of” extra on the DVD is full of the cast saying “er” a lot and a brief explanation of how you can make a realistic submarine shark attack by shaking the camera whilst the actors move around a bit. I am a supporter of DVD extras which include director’s commentaries (especially for Asylum films) and fascinating behind the scenes shots. Unfortunately this seemed a waste of a good opportunity. The Asylum’s “Death Racers” had a commentary which was as entertaining as the film itself (almost). Is it too much to ask for a little bit of effort in the production? I am aware of budget and time constraints with regards to these films but that does not excuse some laziness. There is nothing wrong with wanting to make a dialogue-heavy film (as the making-of suggests) but at least spend some time getting the dialogue right. megashark_still1 (of music fame) heads up this film and spends most of it despairing at different coloured fluids in test tubes whilst simultaneously ignoring the desires of one man and getting busy with another one! She is adequate to a degree but is far from being a headliner. I would hope that she returns in future films with a better understanding that the film she is in is just not that serious (the clue is in the title). megashark_still3 certainly knows what he is in and acts accordingly. His scenes are some of the best and each of them are accompanied by an outside shot of a military base (identifiable by an up-the-nose shot of a soldier wearing dark glasses). As mad as it seemed, I had hoped to be greatly entertained by Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus. Seriously: can you really expect any film with this name to try and be good? If the film had many scenes of blatantly fake creatures whilst the cast sarcastically uttered: “oh no! A giant prehistoric shark! Run, before it leaps out of the sea and kills us all” then I for one, would have laughed my socks off! Sadly this was not the case! That is not to say that the film was shy of silliness! A shark leaps out of the sea some several thousand feet in the air and bites a plane! No really! I’ll be honest: this was a highlight of the movie! If they had continued down this silly path, then the film could have been considered a parody and it could have been greatly more entertaining! Such a shame it didn’t...and wasn’t Conclusion: Be honest! You didn’t expect a film entitled Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus to be an Oscar winner did you? This is your run-of-the-mill Godzilla style silliness that takes itself just a bit too seriously! Laziness in the direction, screenplay and editing reveals what it truly is: awful! Is it too much to ask for better special features on a DVD? Commentaries are always welcome. Can’t there be someone following the crew with a camera in hand to let us into the procedure of making an Asylum film? I'll volunteer to follow these people with a camcorder if only to gain insight into the world of a studio that greenlit this crap! Rating: 1.5 out of 5

Comments are closed.